3 Minutes


Jul, 2016

On Day Two of my period on the dark, dark moon, I had a dream. Interesting and powerful and power-giving, it gave me new strength. Dreams have a way of being elusive when I try to capture them forever in letters and sentences, but I knew that this story had a desire to be told.

Let me see if I can tell it to you now…

I was lost in a new city and I knew I had a plan to meet up with some people at the theatre, which was on the other side of town. I was running late and on foot still, because I couldn’t flag down a taxi (no Uber yet in my dream state). I also desperately needed to pee. So I caught an enormous red double decker bus and climbed up to the top. It was set up like an apartment, complete with enormous cast iron pans and an industrial-sized mixer on the shelf above the stairwell.

That were not secured.

So when the bus swayed and took corners wildly, the heavy pans and huge appliances would slide along their shelf, threatening to crash down into the stairwell, flattening and trapping passengers in a news-breaking Culinary Transport Disaster.

But they never did.

Turns out my dream was going to be a lot more interesting than a few knocked over pots and pans.

As I was approaching my stop, I climbed down the stairs to wait. Near the door was a toy box and I bent down to look into it. Three plastic sticks of dynamite, the statue of Liberty, a gold sheriff badge, a car. I picked up the 1920s style wooden racing car. Long body, yellow with a red stripe circling her nose she was simply made with strong, good wheels. Inside, there were two wooden pegs with eyes painted on them. The driver and his passenger. I’d need them all, I thought as I tucked them into my evening clutch.

The bus stopped conveniently right outside the public toilets and I stepped off and looked around.  Afraid, timid, unsure, I walked up to the booth at the front entrance and into the foyer which was manned by three rough looking gangster types. Narrowed eyes, black t-shirts under black leather jackets, hair slicked back, they were eyeing up the owners of full bladders and uneasy bowels like they were pieces of meat in a butchery window display.

“That will be 35 bucks” one of them said, gesturing to a wooden bowl in front of him stuffed full of cash.

I was incensed. “But it’s a public toilet!”

The men bristled and pulled back their jackets to show what they were packing.

I stared them down. Let the rage boil up inside me and spill over.  

I pulled back my own jacket to show my red ball gown, plunging neckline and the gold sheriff star from the bus pinned to my dress strap. I leaned forward.

“I’ll shut you down for less than that,” I hissed.

I watched them shrink back and quite pleased, I took the cash from the bowl and tucked it into my bag with the rest of the night’s haul.

“That’s better. I was needing some cash tonight”.

I relieved myself in the bathroom, walked back into the foyer and ignoring the glares, I stepped out into the balmy air and down the alleyway. It was dark and quiet and I was alone except for the homeless man asleep in his cardboard mansion. I stood over him, his face peaceful as I tucked the money into one of his boots.

I took out the toy car and driver and tipped the passenger peg back into my handbag. Cradling the car in my hands I breathed,

“Grow car grow,  
Be more than you know. 
I believe in you, 
Now help me see this through.”

I placed the car on the road and stepped back onto the footpath. I could hear the tiny car creaking, its wood stretching as it started to grow.

And grow.

And grow.

Within a minute it was full size, its engine purring, black haired driver at the wheel and ready to go. I opened the side door and stepped in.

“Opulence Theatre” I said, and the car moved forward easily. I didn’t need to give directions to the driver – he knew those streets better than I, having tracked them for decades inside the bus.

We turned into the theatre driveway and then pulled into a large courtyard, surrounded by white and cream-coloured, two-storey stone buildings. I could see the red carpet snaking out of a doorway up ahead on my left where the security guards and valets were waiting. One stepped out with a white gloved hand and my driver stopped.

“Tickets please.”

I reached into my clutch and handed over the yellow envelope to him.

“Welcome Empress. Let me get the door for you.”

I stepped out of the car, and held my driver’s gaze. I raised my hand as if to touch my cheek and spread three fingers wide.

‘Three! I breathed into his mind.

He winked with his left eye and the car pulled away gently, across the courtyard, past the fountain and back into the night.

I passed through the metal detector and into the building, my gown sashaying behind me. I stopped to look around, get my bearings and compare it all to the memory of the blueprints I’d seen that morning. The polished marble floors gleamed in the foyer and contrasted with the red carpet leading straight ahead into the main auditorium. I could hear the clinking of champagne glasses and muted laughter off to the left behind a large screen. On either side of the foyer, wide staircases swept up to the private boxes. Yes, the blueprints were accurate.

I pulled out the Statue of Liberty.

“Support me later! I breathed into her and reaching down to flick off my heels, I placed her into the pot-plant just a few steps from the entrance. She looked quite at home in there and would not arouse suspicion.

I stood up and ran to the staircase on the right, taking them two at a time. At the top I pulled out the passenger peg and bending down, placed it squarely in the middle of the step. I crossed the carpeted floor in my bare feet, ducked into a narrow dark hall and entered the first corporate box on my left. I reached into my bag and did what I came to do.

Backing out of the doorway, I could hear yelling and turned my head in time to see them coming for me from down the hall. The first bullet missed and I ran again, this time zigzagging across the carpet. As I got to the peg on the stairs, I shouted.

“Block me! I felt the steps start to rumble as I flew down them.


Whomp! Whomp! Whomp!

I heard the impact of guard after guard crashing into the solid wooden wall that had violently erupted out of the carpet behind me.

I got to the bottom of the steps, heart racing as more security spilled out from behind the screen. I knew it was going to be close.


I heard an enormous explosion above me.

The rush of air knocked me down and I was winded. My ears were ringing and I felt the next two explosions rather than heard them.

“Support me!” I gasped as I crawled towards the pot plant while pieces of the ceiling came down.

A massive pillar burst out of the pot plant, splitting the pot and shooting out green leaves like nature’s own fireworks display. The pillar was wide enough to keep up the ceiling around me and shield me from raining debris as I commando crawled across plaster and glass and out the door.

Outside, chaos reigned. People lying on the floor stunned. Cars overturned.

Women in their ball gowns with eyes closed, mouths open and screaming but I still couldn’t hear them.

I stood up, shaky. My eardrums were throbbing. I leaned against the stone of the building and with it supporting my right shoulder, I willed my legs to walk and shuffled as best I could down the driveway.

Out of the darkness a yellow blur sped towards me but I didn’t see it until it was nearly on top of me.

“It’s been three minutes! Get in!” My black haired driver leaned over, pushed open my door and I climbed in.

I slumped into the seat and didn’t look back.

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